Single Egyptian Female: We All Know Her

We all know her, we see her in the streets all the time. She’s in her twenties and not married. She’s your average, upper middle-class working girl whose daily struggles frame her life and limit her dreams.

She gets harassed daily and cherishes her virginity.

She works her butt off at work, maybe more than her male peers, and her mom is trying with all her means to get her married.

She’s serious about how she deals with people and some of them think she’s tough. They don’t know that she sometimes goes to the bathroom to cry a little.

She has a gym subscription that she commits to, along with her usual salads, and turns to cupcakes and ice cream every time something bad happens.

She’s having a quarter life crisis. Here, her innermost thoughts:

 

 

Relationships:

I want to be alone, but not lonely – what’s the difference? Lonely is to feel that you have no one. Ever. But alone is to be single and, eventually, alone is going to get you to lonely. Because everybody is getting married.

OMG – in 10 years they’ll all have kids and I’ll be the weird aunt.

Sometimes I want to get married and have kids, kids that I’ll treat differently and raise better than my parents did with me. Should I get married for kids only? What if the guy sucks?

If I get married at 25 and die at 50 I would have had been married exactly half of my life. And – I think – I’ll live at least to 60.

Do I wanna live to be that old? Is 60 too old? God, I don’t wanna be saggy!

It’s either no romance or too much *puke* *feels fake* romance.

That guy I used to have a crush on might not be any better. He’s not exactly Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You, although that’s exactly how I imagine him. I have to tell my mom ’cause I don’t wanna lie. Oh God, not another breakup with mom involved.

Shall I let him kiss me? Do I wanna kiss him? What if he asks for more? Am I ready for more? Would he change the way he thinks of me if we did it? What would happen if my parents knew? Would they be disappointed in me? Would he still want to marry me if anything happened? Do I even want this?

Would he let his sister do that with her boyfriend? Does he let his sister have a boyfriend aslan?! That’s not right! Ughhh.

What in the world would I do if I got married to him and it turns out he’s bad in bed? Will I live the rest of my life unsatisfied? I can never try anything before marriage. That’s a big risk for a life decision! What if I’m bad in bed? How can a person be good in bed or not?

Yea, I’m jealous. But why is he jealous? Simply, these guys are my friends. But those girls might want to marry you and they’re prettier than me. Oh God, I think I’m schizophrenic. Should I marry a guy I don’t love, like the old marriages? Should I take the risk?

Are we best friends – or more? What did it mean when he told me that my skirt is cute?

Maybe I should marry an older guy, but why is he alone at 34? That’s a little alarming… look who’s talking.

You know what? I have too many problems in my life and I don’t need another… let’s hold that.

 

Career:

Why can’t I find a job? All the things I like aren’t hiring people with zero experience! And I don’t want to work in a boring job. I need creativity and a nice work environment. I want an interesting career, maybe start my own business and be on the cover of Forbes Egypt in 10 years. I would look good in there. I also need good pay because I want to stop taking money from my parents, being independent and all.

Oh my God! I hate my job, why do I have to stay all of these long hours? And why is my boss such a douchebag?

This is my check! I don’t want to pay taxes, why am I paying taxes?!

Should I travel? Or should I do my Master‘s? What if it’s hard? Do I want to go back to studying again? Ohhh how about traveling while doing my Master’s! It can be a fun trip and I’ll live away from my parents… Will my parents agree to me traveling alone for a long time? Will they finance me all the way? Maybe I can work and study! Or maybe I can look for a scholarship! I don’t need their approval, I’m a grown woman.

Do I have to choose between living as a career woman, waking up at 40 with a closet full of Chanel and a face full of Botox, lonely and bitter? Or will I wake up at 40, fat and running around with my kids?! Maybe I can start a cupcake business! I love baking and it won’t take that much time – not like a 9-5 job, right? Why do I have to choose between my career and having a family? Why can’t I do both? Let’s not think about that…

 

Self Image:

I love that dress I saw in Vogue, the model looks like a goddess in it. Maybe I should get it for my friend’s wedding! I look like a stuffed marshmallow in this, I need to lose weight.

Look at this new macarons place, so yummy! Careful… it will go straight to my thighs. Am I eating this emotionally? I’ll just have a salad… How many calories are in a salad?

What did that woman mean when she asked me if my brows are real? Are they too thick? And why does the girl in the spa think I need a facial? Am I breaking out? Maybe I should stop putting on makeup? Do people notice when I have a pimple? Do they notice it when I don’t have any makeup on? Oh my God why is this woman wearing this smoky look to work? Am I jealous of her? Can I pull that off?

Yalla, get up go for your run! Cairo Runners are not better than you! Yalla run, it’s not that bad! I’m going to lose weight easily and maybe even quite smoking. Which reminds me, I need to take a puff before going back home. Damn my legs are giving up! How long can this track be? I can’t take it anymore. That was awful! I wish I was a guy… just eating whatever I want and losing weight over weekends playing football.

I can’t believe a man is harassing me when I’m in my sweats! I live in the country of PERVS!

Should I dye my hair red? I was thinking Rihanna red isn’t good for work, so how about just a deep burgundy color. Shall I do bangs or chop it all off? It worked on Miley maybe it will work on me? Ohh I’ll try this app to see how haircuts would look on me… I look like Mr. Potato Head! Just because he broke up with me doesn’t mean I need to change my hair! Or maybe I should just do whatever I want; it’s my hair. Um, I’ll take that hair decision later…

 

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