I used to to live in Abu Dhabi for 10 years before I moved back to Egypt for college, five years ago. It was not planned, it happened so abruptly and overnight; I found myself in a country I virtually knew nothing about, having to live without my inseparable family.
It was one of the most personality-shaping and life-changing experiences I’ve ever had in my short life. And since it is my senior year, I can’t help but reminisce over my first few months in Egypt every once in a while and how far I’ve come since then.
I realized that during my first couple of months in Cairo, I found that I was bonding most with people that have – like me – moved back to Egypt after almost forever staying in an Arab Gulf country.
Thinking back, it only seemed fitting as there were certain things only we can understand through experience. So here are some of the things that you will most probably relate to as well, if you just moved back to Egypt from a Gulf country:
1. Almost every person you meet points out how weird your dialect is
They usually open with questions like “Enta kont 3ayesh barra sa7?” or “Enty mesh men hena sa7?”
2. You are scared by how crazy the pace of life here is compared to where you came from
3. Crossing streets feels like the Passover
You never get when or where you’re supposed to cross the streets without getting killed.
4. How traffic works here in general bewilders you every single day
Traffic lights are a foreign concept here. So are lanes. So are speed limits.
5. And your first driving experience will turn you into either a crying baby or a raging madman
You start realizing that driving here is a completely different game from what you were used to in any other country and that the only rule here is: There are NO rules!
6. When people say 7pm, there’s a very good chance you are the only one that actually arrives at 7pm
Then you will realize that when people say 7pm, they really mean 10:30.
7. You are frustrated by the standards of service here
And your friends constantly make fun of you because you’re “shab khaleegy sees” or something of that sort. And to behonest, you will realize (quickly, I hope!) that you have to lower your lavish Gulf standards to be able to make it here, or anywhere else in the world for that matter.
8. It takes you some time to get used to the volume at which most people speak here
Unless you come from a naturally very loud family, like I do. In that case, congratulations, you win at Egyptian life.
9. You can not wrap your head around why it is so crowded. ALL. THE. FREAKING. TIME.
What could possibly be causing a deadlock at 7pm on a Wednesday? Or why ON EARTH is there a waiting list at COSTA (I swear to you it happened!) on a Tuesday afternoon? Nobody knows, and it looks like we’re not meant to.
Just give it three months and your threshold for what qualifies as “crowded” will be extremely high. You will thank Cairo later.
10. And you think that being stuck in traffic for an hour is a total nightmare
Oh, honey!
11. Your first days of winter here are extremely rough
Apparently, it happens overnight and – God knows how – you MUST be prepared. It is also a big change from the 28-degree-winter you’ve been used to.
12. You miss the demographic diversity and the ability to speak in three languages/dialects without sounding like a douche bag
13. You are thrown off the first time you hear “el nas hat2ool 3alena eh?”
It was basically every man for himself on the other side and now you’re expected to take the views of your family, relatives, neighbors, doorman, the guy who sits at the koshk near your building into account.
14. During your first week/month, you constantly think you’re going to be mugged/raped/killed
Thanks to the media exaggeration and your parents’ irrational fears. Later, you realize that while it may not be as safe as your second home, for the most part, it’s fine.
15. You can’t believe that everything here stays open til dawn
Until you actually see it!
16. You try extra hard to look and sound all local when taking a cab so that the driver won’t raise the fare…
…as you were multiply warned by your parents.
17. Your family makes you feel like a fool for paying whatever you pay to whomever you pay it
“La2, lazem tefasly!” “Da de7ek 3aleky 3ashan fakrek mesh men hena,” and so on. Thank you for turning me into a haggling monster, geddo!
18. You are constantly warned by your relatives against the people who want to hang out with you for your money
Avwara much? I don’t know about other fellow movers’ experiences, but thankfully, I found that to be a complete false alarm on my end.
19. You laugh at almost everything anyone says
I don’t know if it was the then weird, heavy Egyptian accent or our natural sense of humor, but for my first few months, everything anyone said was funny.
20. You either (almost) immediately love or hate Cairo
But it grows on you after a while, anyway.
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