In many circles, “feminist” is an ugly, dirty word used to describe women of a certain (generally undesirable) type. Sadly, the negative connotations and misconceptions associated with the title have forced many would be feminists to avoid it altogether.
So for those of you who hold these perceptions about feminists, think again:
1. Feminists are all radical
The core belief of feminism is that men and women are equal human beings who deserve equal treatment in the eyes of the law and by practice in society. There is nothing radical about believing in people’s fundamental equality.
2. Feminists hate men
Nothing could be further from the truth. Feminism is not a zero sum game. Supporting women’s equal status in society does not, in any way, take away from the structurally enshrined status of men in societies all over the world.
While feminists may be outspoken when it comes to identifying privilege that men carry with them in everyday life (and weak or insecure men may feel threatened by strong women) calling out reality does not translate to hatred or even dislike.
3. Feminists are hairy and unhygienic
We’ve all heard it – “She’s a feminist. She probably doesn’t shave her body hair or wear deodorant. Gross!”
Let me first premise by saying that no woman has any obligation to you, or anyone in society, to shave her body hair. It’s a woman’s personal choice what she wants to do with her body and even if she looks like a Sasquatch, no one has the right to shame her for making her own decisions. After all, men don’t get judged when they refuse to shave.
On the flip side, there are plenty of feminists who DO shave their legs, their armpits and their cooch. And there’s nothing wrong with that either! Because guess what? Every woman is her own free agent and no one on Earth, not even other feminists, has the right to tell another woman what to do with her body.
4. Feminists are all a bunch of lesbians
This one is a personal favorite of mine because it derives from the common belief that feminists all hate men, as well as a complex some men have where they feel personally victimized by assertive women. For example, if a woman refuses to submit to a man’s will, it means she must be a lesbian.
First of all, people who make this claim seem to conveniently forget that men can also be feminists. What about the self-proclaimed feminist, Ashton Kutcher? Is he a lesbian?
But yes, there are feminists who are lesbian, some of the most prominent being the great deconstructionist thinker Judith Butler, along with Irshad Mangi, Ellen Degeneres and Wanda Sykes.
5. Feminists are unladylike
*buuuuuurp* Oh, excuse me. I suppose that depends on what you mean by unladylike. There’s plenty of variation within feminism, but generally speaking women who identify as feminist tend to question the legitimacy of behaviors expected of them from society.
If it’s socially acceptable for a man to burp in a public setting, why shouldn’t a woman be able to do the same? Right?
6. Feminists have anger problems
WHAT?!?!?! We….don’t….have….anger problems. No, but really?
Women have every right in the world to be angry. Every day we face discrimination based on our biology and the culturally promoted perceptions that come along with it.
In the workplace, we receive only a fraction of a man’s salary in the same position – we’re widely viewed as emotional, illogical and incompetent. Our opinions are shrugged off by men who don’t take us seriously and who also view us as “less respectable” in positions of authority.
Every day, all over the world, we’re faced with the threat of physical and sexual violence. In Egypt, we face sexual harassment on a daily basis and we even get blamed for our own assault when we speak out against our male aggressors.
So if we’re angry, just accept it and listen to what we have to say. Don’t shame us or try to derail the conversation by writing us off as “angry” or “emotionally volatile” – that discrediting attitude is part of the problem and you’ll become our case in point.
8. Feminists all hate bras
Many of us actually like wearing bras because they give us support and just generally look nice. Not all feminists believe bras are oppressive – many even wear designer and would rather commit seppuku than throw them in a fire. Also, sports bras are a gift from God.
9. Feminists are all the same
Feminists come in every shape, size, ethnicity, nationality, sex, gender, orientation and their specific beliefs vary according to individual. The single common denominator that unites them is their fundamental belief in women’s equality. That’s all.
WE SAID THIS: It’s time to reclaim feminism. In the meantime, check out “9 Things Women Want Arab Men to Know“.