It was 2 AM when one of my girlfriends called me sobbing like a child on Eid morning with no Eideya. My friend only spoke one sentence before disappearing into a black hole of endless tears. Her words were “I’m going to be single forever!”
I blame the movies, the pop songs, the Nicholas Sparks novels that have brainwashed almost all of us into believing that being single is the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone. On the contrary, being single is the opposite of that.
I’ve been in a healthy and very loving relationship for the past six years. I love my other half so much. My relationship with him can be described as a flying unicorn that cannot stop farting butterflies and rainbows because of how happy I am – me being said unicorn.
But (yup, there’s always a damn but), some small part of me misses being single. You see, I was one of those girlfriends that called other girlfriends at ungodly hours to cry about someone who wasn’t worth a piaster, all because I wanted so bad not to be single. When I look at myself back then, I wish I had told myself not to worry because being single is okay. Actually, scratch that, being single can be very good for you.
Before I delve more into this, I would like to ask you to – PLEASE — not get me wrong. I do not wish to be single (because remember the unicorn?), I just wish I was better at being single back when I was one. Now that we’ve got this out of the way, we can proceed.
Contrary to popular belief, being single should not be wasted crying over boys or girls who do not – probably – deserve you. Your precious time in Singleville should be spent focusing on yourself and doing your thang (with a freaking “a,” yes). In the future that may seem very impossible to you at the time where you actually are in a relationship, you will probably not have enough time to focus on yourself or do your thang.
I am in no way saying that relationships hold you back, they don’t – unless they did. I am saying that in relationships, you might not have time to do that. If you want to take a pottery class, take it; if you’re feeling like hiking in Petra or Mount Sinai, do that. If you need to dance the night away until the sun comes out to play, then by God, you put your dancing shoes on until you lose yourself.
When one is in a relationship, their time will mostly be dedicated on one another to shine bright like the beautiful diamonds Rihanna sang about. You’ll probably never have enough time to take that pottery class, your other half might not be into hiking, and they will possibly want to leave the party early when all you want to do is welcome the sun with a Chelsea smile.
When my friend called me whilst she cried at 2 AM, I snapped her out of it and told her she’s going to be just fine.