Dear Arab Husbands, We Shouldn’t Have to Beg for Help with OUR Kids

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“Don’t leave the kids with me for more than 2 hours.”

“I won’t change diapers. You need to be back home before any accidents happen.”

“You can’t take that job because you need to pick up the kids from school. Not me”, he said.

This article isn’t about the beauty of motherhood; raising a child and watching him/her blossom into a beautiful human being. This piece is about the other side of the coin, the harsh reality that most Arab moms endure, whether a stay-at-home or working one.

Most men never actually help with the kids. There I said it! And when for some miraculous reason it happens, you never hear the end of how damaging it was to his psychology, how he changed his plans for the kids and he makes damn sure you admit that he helped you.

Why do we even need to beg for help? Last time I checked, the children are OURS, not mine. You are not babysitting your own kids, it’s called raising children. The time you spend at work to financially support your family equals the same amount of time moms are drained of life trying to keep everything in order, whether it’s the house, the kids or the ones who miraculously manage to maintain a career on the side because they still have dreams and desires.

It is 2016 and women still have to explain themselves and give excuses when we can simply have it all. Why do men make it difficult for us to leave the house to buy something? Why do men freak out when we ask them for an hour-long break to freshen up? Why is it okay for him to nap but when I collapse at 8PM from exhaustion I’m the boring one? Why do I have to quit my 9AM to 3PM job because he has to pick up the kids from school once a week?

We don’t expect men to stay home with the kids while we pursue our careers, but at times it is devastating that you have to give up the one remaining part that is solely yours, because your partner won’t give an extra hand. No wonder divorce rates are sky rocketing!

 

WE SAID THIS: A piece of advice to Arab husbands, if you want a happy marriage, help your wife with the kids, share the burden before she snaps. You are not just a piggy bank.

 

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