Our ultra conservative culture sometimes forces us to listen to very messed up conversations about marriage/pre-marriage experiences. Some of us, including myself, have been forced to listen to them for so long that I genuinely don’t believe I can’t listen anymore. This is a listicle about the things we should not associate ourselves with, and absolutely must end.
1) If you don’t own a car
Her mom would tell you, “w hatbahdelha ba2a ma3ak fel mowasslat?”
2) If you work in the fields of arts
Unless her parents are open-minded, you’ll find a very rough time explaining that what you do is respectable and has nothing to do with pornography. Trust me, this happened to someone I know before.
3) If you don’t own a spacious apartment
Her parents will never agree to let their daughter get wed in either a rental or your parents’ flat.
4) If your parents are divorced
I don’t really get that one in particular; but society defends it by saying that children of divorced parents are usually not emotionally or mentally stable. More than half of my friends have divorced parents and they’re doing really well, so I don’t know where that idea came from.
5) If you have relatives who belong to the working class
If you have relatives who work as drivers, cooks or office boys, her parents will bash you so hard and give you an absolute no. Of course, that won’t be the case if you’re lucky and her parents are leftists.
6) If you don’t have a college degree
No matter how rich you are, what position you occupy, if you don’t have a degree, I’m sorry to tell you that you’re not worth five piasters in her household.
7) If you adopt deviant beliefs (that you can’t hide)
You can have socio-political stances, religious/anti-religious ideologies that are not anywhere near what her parents adopt, unless you can’t hide them, then you can’t get married. You’re just easily not fit to be the husband of their precious daughter.
8) If you don’t have siblings
“w tekhallefolna 3eyal ma2too3een men shagara wala 3am wala 3amma?”
9) If you’re an ex-addict or have ex-addicts in your family
Biggest shobha in the world.
WE SAID THIS: I wonder if Mr Robot was set in the Egyptian society, what would he have done?