20 Names You Will Never Find on a Coke Can

With all the hype surrounding Coke’s newest cans and the slew of people who would love to see their names on a can, we got to thinking… For sure there are a bunch of poor citizens out there who will never see their names on a Coke can. Why, you ask?

Because their parents were evil a-holes who didn’t care that their kids would get bullied on school playgrounds – and now they don’t even stand a chance getting that coveted Coca-Cola happiness they deserve!

Here are 20 people who will probably never see their names shining on a can:

 

Poor Bahiga & Baheeg, they never stood a chance (if you know what we mean):

 

Enshera7, intense!

 

3atrees, your parents had it out for you from day one:

 

Boogie, without Tamtam, you’ll never get your own can, man:

 

Fatakat? Does this name really exist or is it just an urban myth?

 

We know this name was originally for royals and all, but come on…

 

With a name like that and an even more annoying personality, you definitely – from the day you were born – were meant to suffer on this earth:

 

Supposedly, this guy is the dude who runs the Ultras from behind the scenes… With all the trouble you’ve been causing, no can for you:

 

Poor lam3y, we don’t even know what your name means:

 

Although your name is a bit more common than the rest, there probably isn’t enough room for your name on the can:

 

Reminds us of a supermarket – wasn’t there a supermarket called Matbouly?

 

Just one of those names that represents a whole generation, just not this one:

 

Really in the name game, Nefeesa you never stood a chance:

 

Being notorious murders and all, we’re sure you’ve been unfortunately overlooked:

 

Sexy, trouble making belly dancer? You deserve your own Coca-Cola line:

 

Sawsan we love you, we don’t know why they named you this, but we love you:

 

Such an unfortunate name for a man… Now imagine all the women who have been named the same thing:

 

Probably short for Sherif, Sharaf, or the likes, Shico you just got shafted:

 

Taghreed? Really? Why?

 

Wanees, you won’t have a can to keep a copy of this year:

 

WE SAID THIS: Hard luck, guys! At least you got a picture with your name on it now!