Mommy Diaries: I Am My Mother!

I was discussing some very important concerns with my mother the other day. Things about home, work and everything else I had on my mind. Rather than comforting me or offering me a solution, she responded with a suggestion that made me so angry I think I felt my blood boil.

Once you lose weight everything will be ok.

So according to this logic, all skinny people are happy. They have no problems and everything just sorts itself out.  That just can’t be true. Most of the skinny people I know are miserable. I blame it on the lack of carbs.

Then, as I was furiously trying to tell her how ridiculously off topic her comment was, I realized that her eyes had practically glazed over and she was now staring at my hair.

Did you really have to cut it so short?

And everything made sense. She can’t hear me. Her ears are fine but she just doesn’t care. I was so offended. I huffed and I puffed and I stormed out.

She later called me to ask me if I had basil.

L came home from school that day super excited and was hopping like a bunny while spilling juice from her juice box everywhere. So as she was telling me her story about whatever it is that happened in school, all I could think was how sticky the floor was going to be. I told her that was great but to be careful with the juice.

The damn juice. I wasn’t paying attention to her, just the damn juice. 

I am my mother. I ignored L’s story to focus on whether or not the floors would have to be cleaned again. I panicked and worried for all of 2 minutes… and then I realized my mom is awesome. She’s passionate, generous, impulsive, funny, and can easily turn into a psychotic mass murderer to protect her family. She can abuse* you like no one else while making you feel like the most loved person on the planet. And my mama always, and I mean always, gets her way…

What more could we want?

*with her words of course.