Mommy Diaries: Be Kind To Others

My daughters were playing the other day, when my father turns and warns me never to leave the girls alone for too long because they might kill each other.  After a moment of awkward silence, I reminded him that Lana was two and Zein is only 7 months old. That, strangely enough, made no difference to him. So of course that lead us to a long conversation that eventually became about man’s inherent nature.

Are we born fundamentally good? Evil? Somewhere in-between?

My dad is by far one of the kindest human beings I have ever encountered, and yet, he believes that humans are born selfish in order to survive. (This is where my mother chimes in with her theory that his theory only applies to his children and immediate family) That we are born filled with malice because we have been thrown into a cruel world right from the get go, and that our parents’ job is to instill in us a sense of security to help foster the better aspects of mankind such as generosity and compassion.

This theory creeps me out because my father was orphaned at a young age… but anyways…

I look at my daughters and I see their eyes filled with love, curiosity, and trust.  If I promised Lana that nothing would happen to her if she jumped off the couch, she would jump without hesitation. Of course, Lana would probably jump off anything anyway just to see how high she could go, but that’s another story.  But the look that comes over Lana’s face when little Z snatches a toy out of her hand would give anyone the chills.  The same happens to Zein when Lana pushes her out of her way.

So? What is it?

Personally I believe that we have a bigger question to ask. What exactly does good mean? What does evil mean? If a mom beats her child is she evil? Yes. Right? But what if that’s the only kind of parenting she knows? If that is the case, and she’s doing everything she can to raise that child, then is she good? If she hadn’t beaten the child because she didn’t care enough, then does that make her evil?

I guess Anne Rice said it best in Interview with a Vampire when she said that “evil is a point of view”.

It’s hard out there in the real world, for everyone. Stress and pain know no socioeconomic group or religion. And at the end of the day, all that matters is that we do our best to help bring out that intrinsic goodness we have somewhere buried beneath the obscenities and walls we use to protect ourselves.

Let’s just do our part and be kind to one another. Next time you see a flustered cabbie try to change lanes, let him. It’s not his fault we have no lanes. (Again, props to old man Hosni) If you’re out one night and you see someone that looks nice, tell them.

We said this: Let’s make kindness a sign of strength and cruelty a sign of weakness.