14 Types of People We All Meet at Egyptian Sporting Clubs

In most places around the world, the word “club” conjures images of dark rooms with thumping music where people go to drink, dance and enjoy themselves. In Egypt, however, the word “club” conjures images of little kids running around and old people gathered around tables sipping juice. Here are a few you can probably find at every nady, no matter which one you go to:

 

 

 

1. The Male Athletes

 

 

Every guy wanted to be them and every girl wanted to be with them. They walked around in their uniforms like they owned the place and if you’re a girl who grew up at the nady, you probably had a crush on one of them at some point.

 

 

 

2. Beto3 el Golf

 

 

We’ve all heard of them. The people who go to the golf course at night to do “7agat 3eib”. Our mothers all warned us about these people, but has anyone actually seen them?

 

 

 

3. El 3awagez

 

 

There’s always that group of retirees who spend their days socializing at the club and we all kind of wish we were them deep inside. They can usually be found playing croquet or tennis, sipping tea and sunbathing, or speed walking around the track in tracksuits.

 

 

 

4. The Synchronized Swimming Moms

 

 

If you hang around the pool, you’ll surely find a few parents whose primary life goal is to get their kids on the synchronized swimming team. They spend their time at the club kissing up to the coaches and/or bribing them in order to get their kids on the team. Although these moms are most prevalent in the synchronized swimming team, you will find similar parents in nearly every single other sports team.

 

 

 

5. The Teenagers

 

 

Typically found on Thursday evenings hanging out in cliques or couples in front of whatever place they deem the most hip. You can easily tell when they’re around because they’re the loudest people there.

 

 

 

6. The Nannies

 

 

They are all over the kids’ area. Can usually be found trying to calm down a kid who’s having a tantrum or bonding with other nannies while the kids play nearby. They usually take over when the parents finally snap and swear that they will never go back to the club. Shout out to all the nannies for being like second moms!

 

 

 

7. The Over-Excited Kids

 

 

They’re a part of every team at the club and kill time between practices by running around the kids’ area frantically. They can often be found having a sugar rush from all the candy they bought from the candy shack. They know the nady like the back of their hands since they were practically raised there and they have a strong group of friends who are on all the same teams as them.

 

 

 

8. The Coaches

 

 

They have a nickname for each person at the club and it’s probably because they can never remember anyone’s name. They spend their time accepting gifts from overeager parents and bossing kids around. It doesn’t get much better than that.

 

 

 

9. The Security Guards

 

 

They’re honestly done with the club and everyone in it, but they do it for the paycheck. They can usually be found sitting at their posts judging everyone and wishing they weren’t at work or breaking up fights.

 

 

 

10. The Ones Trying to Sneak In

 

 

We’ve all been there; we wanted to get into a club that we weren’t part of and found ourselves trying weird shenanigans just to get in. The most common one is talking on your phone and pretending like you can’t hear the security guy asking you for your carnet.

 

 

 

11. The Walking Dog Show

 

 

They buy a dog for the sole purpose of walking it in the nady and showing it off to all their friends. They’ll usually dress them up too to ensure that they get as much attention as possible. “Shofty kalby el gedid? Lesa gaybah embare7.”

 

 

 

12. El Mestaneyen el 5ena2a

 

 

These people go to the club for one reason and one reason only: to watch fights. Whenever a fights starts, you can bet they’ll be there faster than you can say 5ena2a. And if there’s nothing to watch on a particular day, they’ll just start the fights themselves.

 

 

 

13. The Fashionistas

 

 

They put on their finest clothes and strut up and down the main walkway for the whole world to check out. While most people use the track for exercise, these people view it as their personal catwalk.

 

 

 

14. The Cats

 

 

You may be a member at the club, but everyone knows the cats are the ones who own the place. As long as you’re in the nady, you’re on their territory.

 

 

 

WE SAID THIS: Don’t miss The Types of People You Meet at Heliopolis Sporting Club’s Track.